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  • Is this new in iOS 17 or have I been missing out on this for a year?

    → 10:45 AM, Jun 11

  • visionOS — lowercase v.

    → 10:08 AM, Jun 10

  • Amazing! Best WWDC23 joke so far!

    This reduces Atkins carbon footprint by significantly reducing memory.
    → 8:03 PM, Jun 7
  • → 10:06 PM, Jun 6

  • I will be very unproductive today as I am every #WWDC

    Good luck to all my colleagues who have worked so hard #WWDC23

    → 7:19 AM, Jun 5

  • Rishi Sunak is there greatest Socialist Prime Minister of my lifetime.

    → 7:34 AM, May 11

  • Dave Allen Peter Falk Barry Humphries

    I shared a love of these people with my Gran, born in the North East of England in 1919. They are now all gone, RIP ❤️

    I also watched Basic Instinct with my Gran once, but that is another story.

    → 11:30 AM, Apr 22

  • Since I started at Apple, the quality and frequency of my half abandoned app ideas has definitely improved.

    → 9:43 AM, Mar 18

  • If I run for office, I’ll run in a platform of increasing You’ve Been Framed payments inline with inflation.

    → 10:01 AM, Mar 7

  • Just because you have Imposter Syndrome doesn’t mean you’re not an imposter.

    → 6:36 PM, Mar 2

  • The biggest two lies the middle class spread, the world is a meritocracy and education defeats ignorance.

    → 11:05 AM, Feb 18

  • It’s so weird that BBC Radio 4’s Today programme refuses to have Humanists or atheists on for Thought for the Day. But has horse racing tips!

    → 8:37 AM, Jan 30

  • I call bullshit on this story! 🐮💩

    If I had a billion pounds a Firefly reboot would be the first thing I’d make happen.

    This chap is not real!

    www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-n…

    → 2:36 PM, Jan 28

  • I just thought of fun little app my kids would enjoy. And now I can’t think of anything else! I’ve half convinced myself it would only take me a few hours. I’ve got so much real work and actual parenting to do 😫

    → 1:11 PM, Jan 28

  • This petition has silently reached over 190,000 signatures in the UK. It’s straight out of the, “won’t somebody think of the children“ school of political discourse.

    Thankfully there’s a counter petition we can all sign petition.parliament.uk/petitions…

    → 7:21 PM, Jan 27

  • Write a sad story in four words.

    Written by Graham Linehan
    → 9:59 PM, Jan 26

  • Write a sad story in four words.

    → 9:55 PM, Jan 26

  • OMG tweets.icu is brilliant. Move your favourite Twitter followers to Mastodon.

    Moving my Sport and Politics will finally let me dump the birdsite.

    → 8:37 AM, Jan 24

  • It would be nice if owners of app stores would cover the cost of refunds for Twitter apps that are no longer working.

    It seems that having a few dozen app companies go out of business because of the actions of McMonkey McBean over at Twitter is bad for everybody.

    → 9:16 PM, Jan 21

  • “But McBean was quite wrong. I’m quite happy to say That the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day…” 12/12

    But McBean was quite wrong. I'm quite happy to say &10;That the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day, &10;The day they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches &10;And no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches. &10;That day, all the Sneetches forgot about checks &10;And whether they had one, or not, upon thars.

    → 5:49 PM, Jan 20

  • “Then, when every last cent Of their money was spent, The Fix-it-Up Chappie packed up And he went” 11/12

    Then, when every last cent &10;Of their money was spent, &10;The Fix-it-Up Chappie packed up &10;And he went. &10;And he laughed as he drove &10;In his car up the beach, &10;They never will learn. &10;No. You can't teach a Sneetch!

    → 5:49 PM, Jan 20

  • “All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches, The Fix-it-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches…” 10/12

    All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches, &10;The Fix-it-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches. &10;Off again! On again! &10;In again! Out again! &10;Through the machines they raced round and about again, &10;Changing their checks every minute or two. &10;They kept paying money. They kept running through &10;Until neither the Plain nor the Star-Bellies knew &10;Whether this one was that one... or that one was this one &10;Or which one was what one... or what one was who.

    → 5:49 PM, Jan 20

  • “Then, with snoots in the air, they paraded about And they opened their beaks and they let out a shout” 9/12

    Then, with snoots in the air, they paraded about &10;And they opened their beaks and they let out a shout, &10;We know who is who! Now there isn't a doubt. &10;The best kind of Sneetches are Sneetches without! &10;Then, of course, those with stars all got frightfully mad. &10;To be wearing a check now was frightfully bad. &10;Then, of course, old Sylvester McMonkey McBean &10;Invited them into his Check-Off Machine. &10;Then, of course from THEN on, as you probably guess, &10;Things really got into a horrible mess.

    → 5:48 PM, Jan 20

  • “Belly checks are no longer in style…” 8/12

    Belly checks are no longer in style, said McBean. &10;What you need is a trip through my Check-Off Machine. &10;This wondrous contraption will take off your checks &10;So you won't look like Sneetches who have them on thars. &10;And that handy machine &10;Working very precisely &10;Removed all the checks from their tummies quite nicely.

    → 5:47 PM, Jan 20

  • “Then up came McBean with a very sly wink…” 7/12

    Then up came McBean with a very sly wink &10;And he said, Things are not quite as bad as you think. &10;So you don't know who's who. That is perfectly true. &10;But come with me, friends. Do you know what I'll do? &10;I'll make you, again, the best Sneetches on beaches &10;And all it will cost you is ten dollars eaches.

    → 5:46 PM, Jan 20

  • Then they yelled at the ones who had checks at the start, “We’re exactly like you! You can’t tell us apart. We’re all just the same, now, you snooty old smarties! 6/12

    Then they yelled at the ones who had checks at the start, &10;We're exactly like you! You can't tell us apart. &10;We're all just the same, now, you snooty old smarties! &10;And now we can go to your frankfurter parties. Good grief! groaned the ones who had checks at the first. &10;We're still the best Sneetches and they are the worst. &10;But, now, how in the world will we know, they all frowned, &10;If which kind is what, or the other way round?

    → 5:46 PM, Jan 20

  • “Then, quickly, Sylvester McMonkey McBean Put together a very peculiar machine.” 5/12

    Then, quickly, Sylvester McMonkey McBean &10;Put together a very peculiar machine. &10;And he said, You want checks like a Check-Belly Sneetch…? &10;My friends, you can have them for eight dollars each! Just pay me your money and hop right aboard! &10;So they clambered inside. Then the big machine roared &10;And it klonked. And it bonked. And it jerked. And it berked &10;And it bopped them about. But the thing really worked! &10;When the Plain-Belly Sneetches popped out, they had checks! &10;They actually did. They had checks upon thars!

    → 5:42 PM, Jan 20

  • “Then ONE day, it seems… while the Plain-Belly Sneetches Were moping and doping alone on the beaches” 4/12

    Then ONE day, it seems... while the Plain-Belly Sneetches &10;Were moping and doping alone on the beaches, &10;Just sitting there wishing their bellies had checks… &10;A stranger zipped up in the strangest of cars! My friends, he announced in a voice clear and keen, &10;My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. &10;And I've heard of your troubles. I've heard you're unhappy. &10;But I can fix that. I'm the Fix-it-Up Chappie. &10;I've come here to help you. I have what you need. &10;And my prices are low. And I work at great speed. &10;And my work is one hundred per cent guaranteed!

    → 5:42 PM, Jan 20

  • “When the Check-Belly Sneetches had frankfurter roasts Or picnics or parties or marshmallow toasts…” 3/12

    When the Check-Belly Sneetches had frankfurter roasts &10;Or picnics or parties or marshmallow toasts, &10;They never invited the Plain-Belly Sneetches. &10;They left them out cold, in the dark of the beaches. &10;They kept them away. Never let them come near. &10;And that's how they treated them year after year.

    → 5:40 PM, Jan 20

  • But, because they had checks, all the Check-Belly Sneetches Would brag, “Were the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches.” 2/12

    But, because they had checks, all the Check-Belly Sneetches Would brag, Were the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches. With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they'd snort We'll have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort!' And whenever they met some, when they were out walking, They'd hike right on past them without even talking. When the Check-Belly children went out to play ball, Could a Plain Belly get in the game...? Not at all. You only could play if your bellies had checks And the Plain-Belly children had none upon thars.

    → 5:38 PM, Jan 20

  • A cautionary tail… The Sneetches (2023) by Dr. Seuss, adapted by Richard Stelling @rjstelling / @rjstelling@home.social

    “Now, the Check Belly Sneetches Had bellies with checks” 1/12

    Now, the Check Belly Sneetches &10;Had bellies with checks. &10;The Plain-Belly Sneetches &10;Had none upon thars. &10;Those checks weren't so big. They were really so small &10;You might think such a thing wouldn't matter at all.

    → 5:37 PM, Jan 20

  • Time for a change in BANES? Vote Labour… #realstats

    It's Labour or the Tories in the West of England. Voting Labour keeps the Tories out in BANES. A graph showing Labour coming 2nd in the Metro Mayor race in 2017 and winning in 2021, Tories 2nd and Greens 3rd.
    → 4:51 PM, Jan 16

  • I think this is my favourite Apple product £ for £.

    To UK wall warts, by Apple. These are foldable and probably the best thing Jonny Ive ever designed 🥰
    → 5:10 PM, Jan 9

  • Even more SHOCKING is the @BestForBritian November poll showing the Lib Dems and @Wera_Hobhouse LOSING in Bath! The Lib Dems have for years been propped up by #Labour votes… a straight fight could see significat errosion of the Lib Dem majority and even a Labour victory 🤞🏼

    A bar graph showing Labour winning in Bath with 32% of the vote
    → 12:13 AM, Jan 6

  • I’ve been digging into the @BestForBritain polls from November… #Labour and #Conservatives neck and neck in North East Somerset! This is remarkable, the Lib Dem vote has always been soft but opposing Brexit was their highwater mark. Labour have a real opportunity…

    → 12:07 AM, Jan 6

  • My New Year’s resolution is to consume more books. My plan is to buy any book Jason Snell recommends for my son, and if he enjoys it, I’ll get the audio book.

    First up, Elder Race by Adrian Tchaikovsky

    Elder Race by Adrian Tchaikovsky
    → 10:48 AM, Jan 5

  • I think this one image is responsible for 90% of my moral outlook.

    What was I scared of?
    → 7:41 PM, Jan 4

  • Recommendations for Mastodon to Twitter x-posing services please!

    → 3:08 PM, Jan 1

  • Guttenberg, 2023

    For better or for worse, social media is the printing press of the modern age, and as such, it should be under the control of journalists and news outlets. But journalism has abdicated its responsibility and spend their time whingeing and whining about those who control the presses or so enthralled by them, objective reporting becomes impossible.

    There is absolutely no technological innovation in journalism and a resistance if not outright hostility to new paradigms, such as Mastodon.

    by all means be in the places where the people are, but also provide alternatives. Alternatives that you control that you can’t be banned from or owned and operated by right-wing trolls.

    Free press is a cornerstone to a free democracy  but neither can be free if the means of production are owned by a handful of billionaires. 

    It’s time we used established social media against itself, leveraging its enormous network affects to push more open, less filtered, less centralised services.

    You can breathlessly inform your users how to create a Crypto wallet and fill it with worthless JPEGs, explaining how to create a Mastodon account is not beyond you.

    → 2:16 PM, Jan 1
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